Into the Fire

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Passionate: right or wrong. Writes love stories with a passion. Raw Romantic Redemptive

What or who you really want to be . . .

 

. . . isn’t necessarily what or who you really are or ever will be. That’s hard to hear, isn’t it? It is for me—or I should say it was for me. When my mind threw the desired images into the flash frames of my imagination and the years edged upward and the dreams drifted into partially realized fragments, I accepted that my designs for myself created disappointments and disillusionments.

 

Those inclinations I carried around with me for most of my youthful years didn’t prove to be realistic in the sense of who I “needed” to be. When I met Jesus Christ, I learned that me-focused stuff didn’t bode well for any kind of genuine happiness. It only fostered more of the same dissatisfaction with what was present and an intense hunger for more of the same in ever escalating possessions and accomplishments. Humanity in its fullness is often what we indulge in our dreams and desires without considering who we are meant to be.

 

Man-made dreams might have their origin in God-made dreams, but the moment we take control of them for our fulfillment we lose the significance of the journey toward their purpose. When we fail to abide by “The Plan” and exercise our own versions of getting to where we think we’re supposed to go, we sacrifice the beauty of supernatural provision and the value of lessons learned along the way.

 

I’m grateful for my life. I’ve learned how gracious God has been to me. Beyond what I deserve, he has given me. I pray that I will continue to be the right shade of paint on God’s magnificent canvas. Nothing else matters anymore.  

 

 

Thank you, Lord.   

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4 responses to “What or who you really want to be . . .”

  1. BK Jackson Avatar
    BK Jackson

    The only frustrating thing is not knowing, in some aspects of life, what God’s plan for us IS. Sure, we know the basics. Salt of the earth, light of the world, go into all the nations….
    But what about what job to take? Which direction to go in your writing? And a million other things.
    Sometimes it feels like we don’t get feedback on the dreams and therefore it’s hard to know if we’re heading in the right direction.

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  2. Nicole Avatar
    Nicole

    I’m convinced, Brenda, that the most often given answer to prayer is “Wait”. Not an answer we want to hear, but the divine reason is too complex for finite minds. This is a perfect criticism for those who don’t believe. “How convenient,” they say. “If you don’t get what you want or are working toward, it’s easy to say this God said ‘No’ or ‘Wait’.” However, I’m also convinced that the Spirit speaks to us in multiple ways, and, yes, hearing His voice makes things clearer, but for those who have a hard time imagining that He does, He uses circumstances. Within those circumstances we are forced to learn those things that make us stronger and wiser – which in spite of their value can be a pain to learn. The “do not lean on your own understanding” is a bugger, but it’s true because He’s far more imaginative than we are at our best, and that “end from the beginning” gig makes Him know ALL things. Trust is a big deal to Him as is being thankful. Anyone who thinks walking the talk is easy is still taking baby steps – or crawling.

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  3. BK Jackson Avatar
    BK Jackson

    As a follow up to that, I’d like to ask you (or anyone who feels like responding), how do you arrive at a point in your life where you are waiting productively vs. just feeling like you’re in eternal limbo? One feels healthy and satisfying, the other doesn’t.
    And its an area that confuses me greatly.

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  4. Nicole Avatar
    Nicole

    Honestly, Brenda, the determination is a spiritual exercise. You basically choose it by focusing on the blessings instead of the unfulfilled portions that remain in this life. Can we really do what we hope to do in our lifetimes? At some point, the questions we ask have no merit. If you believe that God is involved in your life – and by that I mean minutely – then you decide to trust that this limbo-esque state of mind will be overcome by His plan for you.
    I’ve said to the Lord, “God, just throw me a bone. Please. Just a bone so I can go on.” He does. Sometimes it’s only a bone. Other times it’s a slab of meat. I know the feeling(s) you’re describing. I do. I’ve been there. Many times. I’ve had to learn my status, my “advancement” out of the desolate places, my desire to serve Him from a present place of anonymity, it’s up to Him. Not me.
    This life is not our own. It’s His. What I’ve learned along this often unpredictable journey is blessing follows obedience, and confusion is from the enemy.
    Probably not much help, Brenda. I’m sorry. But I’m praying for you . . .

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