Into the Fire

Casualty

My marriage was one of the many casualties of this case. Shredded like the pathetic and horrid corpses which turned up when and where we least expected to find them. I should have seen the torturous decline in our relationship—and maybe I did. Maybe it was somehow easier to see the gruesome deaths of unknown-to-me individuals than to witness the slow murder of my marriage.

They say it takes two to destroy a relationship, but there’s no way I can fault my wife in any of our decline. I was flawed from the start, and she, being a female, as in full of hope and giddy in love with me, figured it was just a matter of time before I would let down and enjoy what love had in store for us. Oh, I loved her. Still do. So much. More than I thought possible. That’s what scared me off, I think. Yeah, I think that’s what put the gun in my hand, so to speak.

(2008; Nicole Petrino-Salter)