Into the Fire

Passionate thoughts about the world of writing and the Power of God

 

I’m married to a tender-hearted macho man who spent 30 years in the world fine-tuning his bad boy image. Jesus wrestled hard for him, and the result is a dashing and passionate Christian man. Don’t think it’s been all bells and whistles for us. We packed a lot of baggage into our marriage, and it’s taken us many years to sort out the contents of those well worn suitcases.

 

My husband came from a broken home, and I came from a stable wonderful home with two loving parents who were only separated when the Lord took my mom home at the early age of 62 years. My husband had some makeshift Catholic background, and my dad was Catholic, my mom Methodist. I always believed in God but didn’t know Jesus. Both of my parents were Christians when they died, and my husband led his mom to Jesus on her deathbed over the telephone before we scrambled to get to her before she died. We didn’t make it. Years later before his step-dad died, they spoke about Jesus on the telephone.

 

This might seem unrelated, but yesterday’s topic regarding sexual issues in Christian fiction and the reactions to this topic by various readers pertain directly to each of our backgrounds. What teachings, experiences, either good or horrific, contribute to our attitudes toward sex?

 

God wired me for romance. At a very young age, kindergarten as a matter of fact, I loved boys. Chased a little guy named Dev around the playground at school. I think I might’ve kissed him! Poor guy.

 

Seriously, though, I love reading good romance that smacks of the real dynamic and chemistry between a male and female. Not graphic descriptions of sexual situations, but passionate episodes between characters which make demands on their sexual decisions. This is real romance for me—the operative word being “real”.

 

I don’t like silliness or sappy. I don’t read “lits” even though those novels always address serious issues. The human dynamic makes the world go ‘round. This relationship is my focus and when done well, it can capture almost anyone’s heart. Well, maybe not Mike’s. Just kidding, Mike.

 

Kristen made the excellent and obvious point about people not suddenly becoming sexual beings on their wedding nights. Indeed. Dayle wondered if some people felt the invasion of their bedroom privacy threatened by sexual issues in novels. Who knows?

 

There can be no denying the fact that God created sex. In its purest form in the Garden it was good. Perfect. We aren’t there anymore, and all kinds of people struggle with their views and practices regarding sexual issues. I can’t begin to speak to most of them.

 

What I can do is tell the stories God has assigned to me. The contrast between the world’s view of relationship, romance, love, and sex to God’s view is huge and merits exposure. I’ve been on both sides of this contrast. I know my limits.

 

What are your limits concerning the portrayals of real romance?  

 

Father, if we submit to you and desire to know your thoughts on difficult issues, you help us. You expect our obedience once we decipher your will. Give us a willing heart. In the Name of Jesus, Amen.

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4 responses to “What’s your limit?”

  1. Dayle Avatar

    I just try not to sound corny.
    I haven’t tried to address the issues you’ve mentioned so it hasn’t been a issue.
    I have been concerned about children (under 16 but especially under 13ish) reading my manuscript because of the implied child molestation.

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  2. Nicole Avatar

    I think it’s important to label novels for adults when the story dictates–as do all of mine so far.
    You didn’t sound “corny”, Dayle. You wrote a good story, and the limited romance was good and real. (I’m sure you’ve added to it since I read it which probably made it more “real”.)

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  3. Kristen Torres-Toro Avatar

    I’m the same–not a big fan of silly, sappy, or completely unbelievable. I also don’t want to read a graphic bedroom scene. This is one reason why I don’t write romance novels–because it’s so hard to walk that line and make the romance sing. I’m really careful about who I read as well. A few years ago a friend of my family gave me a bagful of books on Oprah’s list. I had no clue what was coming until it was too late. Thought it was a coincidence and picked up the second book. After that I stopped reading Oprah’s list.

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  4. Nicole Avatar

    I had a similar experience just before I went to college. A guy gave me a novel to read and to this day I will state it was the worst book I’ve ever read. I had to close out the images, and it took way longer than I hoped. Horrible novel with lots of vulgarity. Heck, it was just plain dirty.
    I think as a writer, you know your niche. You can stray as many do, but you know where you’re comfortable. As a Christian, you learn your limitations and you make every effort to operate within them.

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