Into the Fire

There’s nothing quite like determining to write a novel—and then actually doing it. I’m quite sure it’s easier for some than others. I can speak to my own endeavors and make observations garnered from those with whom I’ve spoken who are in the throes of writing their first novel or are anticipating doing that or who have gotten halfway or two-thirds through one and haven’t revisited the manuscript for . . . years. They still think about it, but they’ve either occupied their windows of writing time no matter how great or small with other things—like blogs and TV and the kids and the dog and reading or anything but that half-finished novel they haven’t even read in how long?

I’m a testimony to the long hard march through the writing desert with that first novel. Those of you who’ve known me awhile remember the 8 and ½ year journey I took in composing my first novel. A direct “order” from the Lord Himself, (I no longer concern myself with the eye-rolling) I began it with a flourish, participating in the rapid unfolding of a story that quickly ascertained its own life right under my fingers as my pen (longhand) could barely keep up with the inspiration. And then . . . work, horses and racing (seven days a week), home-schooling a few years, lay ministry at church, etc. No writing. Not for big chunks of time. Then re-reading. Then writing some more. Then nothing but the same interferences. Some people get up early to do their dutiful writing, but when I got up at 4 AM to get to the track, there would be no “early” writing. Nor late. Anyway, you know the story.

Writing your first novel takes the d-word. Discipline. And if you’ve never had to administer this action in writing form, it ain’t easy—for a lot of us. Sitting still and using whatever means the Lord has given us to construct story—be it outlines or the commonly referred to “seat-of-the-pants” methodology—either way, it’s a learning process that can only be experienced on-the-job so to speak. And since you can only discover your style and voice by trial and error no matter how many instructions you’ve received in classes or through other sources, there you sit with a story formed or forming in your head and only your fingers or dictation to get it into print matter. It sounds way too easy, doesn’t it?

There’s also the learning of writing traits. I realized while into my second novel, which came much easier than the first, I would take breaks from the story. At first it’s a bit unsettling because I wondered if those “breaks” would once again move into months-long hiatuses. Nope. Just a time of refreshing. Not long. And then I raced back to the story. This is how the last five were written. However, 2009 was a vacation year for me from a completed novel. I’m not sure exactly why. I can tell you this, though. Getting back to novels eight and nine has been a rocky, slow-going, undisciplined endeavor. That’s me: if I let up on something . . . well, discipline doesn’t come dutifully like I hope it will. I have to force it into my life. Drive a stake in the ground and handcuff myself to it on a short leash.

One of the reasons for this anomaly is the pleasure factor. When the story’s just beginning, it’s fun and exciting. When it’s ongoing, sometimes it’s rough. Sometimes we don’t hurry back to it after a “break” because we’re not used to listening to what some call “the muse”. We’ve tuned it out for so long, it’s actually annoying to be forced to listen even when we know we want to hear what it has to say. My inspiration for these stories is none other than the Holy Spirit. Period. I am completely idea-less without Him. So, even though I trust He will get my attention where it belongs in my writing world, I also recognize my stubbornness when it comes to disciplining myself in the novel realm. Shame on me.

[Side note here for “new” readers: Just because I lay claim to the Holy Spirit as my inspiration does not mean my work is perfect. I write the words. He gives me the ideas, certain wonderful phrases and characters now and then, but He is not responsible for my failures. I am. The end result is on me. When I sense His pleasure with my effort, I know there’s a reason for me writing it. Even when I don’t know His plans.]

I think this post is the beginning of a push on my part. I know the process—it’s working my way back to doing it. I love the characters and storylines in these two books. I need to catch the vision. Again. And again. Go. Do. It. Pray for me, will ya? And let me know if you need prayer for your writing endeavor(s) too.

Father, you know me. Help me. I want to obey. Give me something I need to press on. Please. In the Name of Jesus, Amen.