Into the Fire

Passionate thoughts about the world of writing and the Power of God

recent posts

about

Passionate: right or wrong. Writes love stories with a passion. Raw Romantic Redemptive

Inferior?

 

                     
Inferiority-md

 

I can't speak for all writers, but I can surmise that many of us have gone through the inferiority blues when it comes to our manuscripts. We had great intentions, and we wrote that story with fervor. We stepped away from it, and when we returned, we were slammed with the fear of utter failure.

It's not that we didn't like what we wrote. It's just that it didn't seem like it would ever measure up to the work of our favorite author(s). We wondered if we'd made stupid mistakes, if we could be any kind of judge of our own abilities, and we concluded we might never make it as a writer. Until . . .

We breathed in and we breathed out. We started rereading and got caught up in a few chapters. We rearranged a few words, enhanced a scene with new purpose, eliminated a few clogged sentences, and felt a dash of excitement over a couple of metaphors, an intense exchange, some very cool dialogue, and actually cried over one character's decision.

Still laden with inferiority fears, we could at least admit that we wouldn't give up. We stood straight and declared: I can write. I can do this. And so we do.

I've known inferiority my entire life. But it hasn't stopped me because I know what the Lord has given me to do. I go forward knowing apart from Him, I can do nothing. There's freedom in that. And humility. 

Write on.   

 

Father, help me to be the one you want me to be. You're the only one who can. In the Name of Jesus, Amen.

 

 

Posted in

8 responses to “Inferior?”

  1. BK Jackson (@BKJacksonAZ) Avatar
    BK Jackson (@BKJacksonAZ)

    Oh yeah, I’ve been through that for sure. Although not necessarily compared to my favorite writer–wouldn’t dream of any trying in that context.
    For me, I guess that’s why I end up re-writing a lot and taking so long for each novel. You read what you wrote the first time, and maybe only 5% of it really sang on read-back. You re-write again, and maybe 15% of it gets to singing to you and so on. Eventually, it becomes the manuscript you want it to be–at least 80-85% anyway. I seriously doubt I’ll ever be 100% satisfied with any novel I write.

    Like

    Reply
  2. Nicole Avatar
    Nicole

    Brenda A. made a comment the other day about voice that got into the spam folder but retrieved. She mentioned over-critiquing affecting voice. I think even if it’s us over critiquing, we can either modify the ms. for the better or change it for the worse. Perfection ain’t comin’ in this lifetime, so we do have to settle for some things which we might perceive as flaws but might really be part of our voice, our style, or our means of storytelling.
    At some point in that writing/editing/critiquing process we must smash down the complexes and realize our abilities. Do we in fact like our story? Do we appreciate the way it’s written? Do we really need to improve the entire novel or just a few pieces of it? There does come a line where we either say “Enough” or “I can’t do this.”

    Like

    Reply
  3. BK Jackson (@BKJacksonAZ) Avatar
    BK Jackson (@BKJacksonAZ)

    Absolutely agree. But I think this is where I have an advantage. Most people are in a hurry to write by necessity–they want it to be a means of income, they’re in a hurry to get known, etc.
    For me, I only get to get at my novel every once in a while b/c other things must take priority so that means I’m taking a lot fresher look at my manuscript when I DO get to it.
    Not that I can’t still be in danger of editing to death, but I can choose to work on this aspect one time, or another aspect another time.
    And I don’t feel pressured to do so.
    But as to whether I’ll choose “Enough” or “I can’t do this” remains to be seen. Stay tuned. 😎

    Like

    Reply
  4. Karin Kaufman Avatar
    Karin Kaufman

    I guess every writer suffers from this feeling. I do too. But my biggest challenge is the hopelessness of feeling like nothing will ever come of my writing — that’s probably universal too.
    A lot of people say they’d continue to write even if they knew they’d never make money. Well, not me. I haven’t got that luxury. I’m self-employed and my sole financial and everything-else support — i.e., no husband. That means working all I can (not writing) and having almost no time to promote my writing or help others promote theirs (which means they won’t help you promote yours). This all leads to envy on top of everything else! 🙂 Not good, I know.
    I guess “I can’t do this” seems a small obstacle to me compared to “I don’t have the time or luxury” or “If I’m just writing for myself, this brain damage is not worth it.”
    Thanks for letting me rant, Nicole.

    Like

    Reply
  5. Nicole Avatar
    Nicole

    Brenda, that is a luxury, and, as you said, most writers don’t have it. I have the same luxury because I can finally say I don’t HAVE to work outside the home anymore. And I learned pretty soon into the writing game my naivete about publishing, marketing, publicity, etc. needed a reality check. Done.
    Karin, you have a blank check for ranting here anytime you want. Open door, my friend. Your situation is critical. That kind of pressure to “perform” with your writing/creativity is severe.
    Your second paragraph exemplifies the kind of pressure you experience. Therefore, the fun or joy of writing is subdued by what is perceived to be little attention or time to get it. I know initially I struggled mightily with the jealousy factor, exclaiming privately “I can write as good as or better than they do!” I had to be gently reprimanded by the Lord when He asked me “Who exactly are you writing for?” My meek answer needed to be “You.” However, I had to face that to begin with it was me. No more.
    I write because he gives me stories. I can’t think of anything without Him. Therefore what He does with those stories is no longer my concern.
    Karin, your situation means you’re in constant defining mode. What must I do to create, where must I expend my efforts, and how do I make the most of this, God? Seems like those are the answers you need.
    And you CAN write, Karin. You CAN.

    Like

    Reply
  6. BK Jackson (@BKJacksonAZ) Avatar
    BK Jackson (@BKJacksonAZ)

    Karin, I can relate. I’m my sole source of income. And while you can make money writing, there’s a huge disparity in time investment vs. monetary return. I get enough of that at my day job 8-).
    I once met a western writer who could knock out a first draft manuscript of 60K in 3 weeks. If I could write with THAT kind of alacrity, I’d have it made (although that author didn’t say what his RE-write process was like…)

    Like

    Reply
  7. Karin Kaufman Avatar
    Karin Kaufman

    Thanks for the open door to rant, Nicole. And for the encouragement.
    My envy comes not so much from feeling I can write just as well as (fill in the blank) as from simply wishing I had the time to write — to do something I love doing. And to not drop dead at the age of 80 still working a job I hate.
    Honestly, I look at this writing thing a little differently. I hope I honor God with my writing, but I don’t do it for him, at least not in the sense I think you mean. I don’t think He needs me to write cozy mysteries and thrillers, and except for my thriller (possibly), I don’t feel He’s ever given me a story. I guess my perspective is different.

    Like

    Reply
  8. Nicole Avatar
    Nicole

    I understand, Karin. I write “for” God in that this is what I’m to do. He doesn’t need my writing in any way, shape, or form, but the ideas and characters come from Him so I write them down.
    I’ll start praying you will have the time you need to write. Somehow, some way.

    Like

    Reply

Leave a reply to BK Jackson (@BKJacksonAZ) Cancel reply