Into the Fire

Where am I going? Ever have so much on your mind as you’re scurrying around town that you have to mentally stop and recalibrate and ask yourself that question? Sometimes to stay on track, you have to ask yourself, “Where am I going?” Next question: how am I going to get there?

I share this with you as someone who is not ashamed to say I need encouragement. Regularly. Repeatedly. Redundantly, even. I can be the Master of Discouragement for very short stints. It hurts, it aches in the soul, you know? For those droplets of time, it’s miserable. I don’t stay there long. Thank you, Lord. He managed to make me resilient. I compare myself to the old child’s toy that was either somehow stuffed or there were those that were inflated also. A child could punch them or push them and they would hit the floor backward and then immediately rebound, bounce back up and face the child’s next punch. Over and over again. Resilient toy. That’s what I feel like sometimes.

I know beyond any shadow or swirling or shifting of doubt, I am supposed to write novels right now. This is my focus, my call, my purpose for this section of my life. So, when someone comes back to me after reading one of my books with wonderful things to say, yes, praise, as to how much it ministered to them . . . Well, let me tell you, I NEED it. I do. And that happened again to me today. My fourth book (Wounds . . . And Healings) produced a response I wouldn’t have anticipated, and it so blessed me. Thank you, my Lord.

So, where am I going? God knows. I don’t. And I have to admit sometimes it’s weary-ing, you know? “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.” I know I keep writing these same things over and over again in my “reflections”, so I apologize if I am “weary-ing” you with them, too.

Heavenly Father, great and awesome God, holy and righteous One, lead me. Please, lead me in those steps ordained for me. May I be ever faithful and obedient to follow. In the Name of Jesus, Amen.